By BROOKLYN BROWN
One Feather Reporter
On the Dec. 12, 2023, Cherokee Court Domestic Violence docket, nine defendants were being charged with criminal domestic and dating violence, another 19 defendants were there to answer civil domestic violence charges. 28 in the weeks leading up to Christmas—the time of year when you’re supposed to be cozied up indoors with the people you love the most.
The holidays can be a scary time for people in domestic violence situations. Similar to the rise of domestic violence during the pandemic, being forced indoors with your abuser consequently exacerbates domestic violence.
In October and November, we’ve seen charges brought against husbands of two murdered women on our Missing and Murdered list.
Two Cherokee men are accused of murdering their wives in the year end of 2023.
At the MMIW Walk in May, sentiments were shared broadly that we are killing our own people. Yes, jurisdictional issues and the devaluing of Indigenous people by colonialism feeds the MMIW crisis, but we are taking our own role in the killing.
What has happened to us, that we devalue each other, and especially our women and children?
In the onset of colonialism, the Cherokee Nation, like many other Indigenous nations, was matriarchal and matrilineal. Our decision making, our kinship, our peoplehood was led by our Clan Mothers. This posed an immediate threat to the patriarchal systems of colonialism. Not only were women the decision makers, but women are the producers of generations. The quickest and most violent way to destroy a people is to violate and kill their women and children, the future of their nation. Cherokee women were raped, killed, kidnapped, and so were their children. Cherokee men were stripped of their title as protector, son, brother, and warrior. We were taught that Cherokee women were not to be War Women, Clan Mothers, or leaders of our nation as we once were. Cherokee women were simply property, objects of violence and brutality for the toxic masculinity that patriarchal society creates. This mentality, I believe, is a large part of why we see such violence against women in our community from the people who are supposed to protect them and love them.
But domestic violence is not a gender specific issue. Men, and other gender-identifying people, face domestic violence as well. We have devalued ourselves altogether. We brutalize each other. We hate each other because we hate ourselves.
Self-hatred is the root of our violence. Violence is not love. Isolation is not love. Control is not love. Murder is certainly not love.
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, contact the EBCI Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Program: Hotline number: 1-800-264-9611, Local number: (828)554-6830.
