Children’s stories, tall tales, ESP and clairvoyance issue.
By WILLIAM LEDFORD
Remember when I previously commented upon an elected official’s ability to transcend the laws of physics, bypass the limits of personal intelligence and become one with the existential universe once in office? Well, I actually didn’t use those particular words or concepts but I did say that “people who get elected to some office and become government representatives immediately become wiser and smarter than they were when they were regular people”. Add clairvoyance to the list of abilities. Later on I’ll explain why.
The LA Lakers, my NBA team since 1968, scored a new coach and the second pick in the NBA draft. The coach is the ex-Laker player, ex-assistant Warrior coach, Luke Walton, son of Bill Walton, the draft pick is the talented but really skinny kid from Dukeback Mountain. All of the sports pundits declared pre-draft that the Lakers would be instantly improved due to the addition of one the top two kids and this coach. Me, I’m skeptical. This kid is not named Kareem, Magic, Kobe, Jerry West or James Worthy, or even Elgin Baylor, Gale Goodrich, Michael Cooper or Jamaal Wilkes, and the Lakers won’t have any of the names I mentioned playing alongside him so I suppose the Laker bar is lowered…again? I guess that one win more than last season might be considered an improvement?
While I was writing this, the Golden State Warriors looked unstoppable in their first two games but they then choked thus making the Cleveland Cavaliers NBA Champions. The media makes it seem like LeBron won the championship all by himself, no help from Kyree Irving, Kevin Love or anyone else. And even though I’d like to blame the officials for letting LeBron push off at will, stiff arm people, throw Curry around and take his usual four steps to the basket, they really just simply sucked throughout the series, missing calls and letting both teams play Rezball. Draymond Green would be an excellent Rezball player with his attention to the nether zone. So, as a response to the officials sucking the Warriors totally collapsed, they need to find a little help, an inside/outside presence to replace Harrison Barnes. Maybe Kevin Durant is available? Nah, he needs to sign with the Lakers.
Muhammad Ali, activist and spokesman, the best and most entertaining boxer that I have had the pleasure to watch, recently passed away at age 74. He was afflicted with Parkinson’s in the last stages of his life and had difficulty with everyday tasks but during his prime he was awesome to watch. And hear. The bouts with Joe Frazier and George Foreman are the stuff of legend but it’s always awesome to remember that he beat the Federal government too. RIP Muhammad Ali.
In the news. Washington Post. May 13. Another discovery has been confirmed that basically blows the assumption of Native people appearing in this “empty” continent 13,000 years ago, and the Clovis theory, out of the water. In Florida a discovery was made a few years ago, just recently retested and announced by virtue of carbon dating that the evidence found, mastodon tusks and bones along with flint tools and weapons, that people were well established in the American SE well over 14,550 and possibly 16,000 years ago. That matches the “find” a few years ago in the South (America that is) of a person found in a submerged cave dating back nearly 14,000 years ago and the find in Oregon. We could have told them that we’ve been here a long, long time. Well, we have been telling them but the “highly-educated” people in the anthropology community don’t like to listen to common sense. If it’s not written in their textbooks or match the Land Bridge Theory some highly educated anthropologists get confused, then extremely defensive, perhaps even weakly violent. They’ve apparently had all of the common sense educated out of them. Like a flint arrowhead or knife, a book is simply a tool, and when the tool gets old or outdated, you employ a new tool. Try telling a religious nut that same thing. Religious nuts in Kansas and Texas believe that the modern world is only around 5,000 years old and modern man co-existed with dinosaurs. I love humor but this stuff is way too funny and because those people actually, truly believe it and spew copious volumes of spittle when excited.
In the world of politics. For all of you Republicans who want to be able to say what you want, call people anything you want, be as ignorant as you want…without having to suffer any of the consequences…well, you can’t. Unless you’re a billionaire. But there’s light at the end of the tunnel. Your candidate for POTUS is all that and does all that. Sane people see how thoughtless he is or appears to be. His supporters, who exist through him wishing that they could do and say these things, usually appear just as…sophisticated.
More politics. Bernie got burned. He started this thing as a cranky old dude from the old school who couldn’t handle the idea of a female president but hid his chauvinism behind a social reform platform and people really bought into that, just my opinion folks. The campaign has just made him crankier, and older, fact. According to indianz.com he was a pretty popular dude in Indian Country. I saw him as some white guy who says all the right things but hasn’t actually done that much, if anything, for Native people. Sayonara Bernie, see ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya.
Politic x 3. The GOP created scandals have taken a life of their own. Republicans love to talk about indictments but the only mention of an indictment was a comment made by a Fox News commentator. Go figure. Nothing there. The Benghazi thing? Six GOP-led hearings, nothing to show for it. By the way, an unnamed Republican Congressman was the individual who leaked the news for both scandals. Republicans apparently have been scheming and planning for 20 years and created an anti-Hillary campaign that now has a life of its own. No real facts or actual crimes, just innuendo and smears. Much Hillary-fear GOP?
OK, now to the main event. I have been keeping track of the council sessions, two and counting, and the disputes regarding the Last Will and Testament recorded by my father which have been aired reservation-wide and streamed nationwide. Remember way back when I mentioned clairvoyance? A remark made in Session 1 expressed an observation during the discussion that Dad was “turning over in his grave” because of the condition of the lawn at his house. Slightly angered by this ill-chosen and highly insensitive remark, I threw something at my TV, I don’t remember what it was, it was kinda heavy, might have been the cat. That’s a joke because cats aren’t that easy to throw. How could this individual attempt to speak for my deceased father? If he knew my father at all he would have known that my father cared for the well-being of his widow first and his lawn second. And then there was an offhand comment made by an old friend of mine regarding “enough time for my father’s widow to get her affairs in order”. I wasn’t aware that this particular Councilor had any experience with the actuality of being a grieving widow but now I’m very afraid for her husband as she seems well-prepared to be a widow. Another joke. I do want to graciously thank the member of Council who showed wisdom and restraint and wasn’t obviously pre-disposed like the other bunch to revoke a life estate without first issuing a warning. Tribal ordinances are so often violated and cleared up with a warning, so why make an example here? I already know the circumstances behind the discussion and I’d like to let Council know something important here, they have leapt with both feet into a dispute between step-daughter and step-mother for no valid reason. Ugly, ugly family business but just step-daughter against step-mother. It’s as simple as that. And family business should never have been introduced into a public forum, especially the Tribal Council meeting of the Eastern Band of Cherokee.
I wasn’t going to end with a joke, this opening of the family closet and the rattling of the skeletons has left me with great frustration, but I’ve changed my mind. My friends, ponder these questions until we meet again.
I’ve seen and heard on TV that four out of five people suffer from diarrhea, does that mean that one of the five enjoys it? If you spin an Oriental person around several times does he become disoriented? In World War II why did Japanese kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Why does Goofy get to stand while Pluto walks like a normal dog? And…finally, is Goofy a dog? What exactly, is Goofy? Reminds me of another joke involving Mickey, Minnie and Goofy. When next you see me, ask and I’ll tell it because, it ain’t for the pages of the One Feather.
Ledford is an EBCI tribal member living in Albuquerque, NM.